The Amazing Miss E.

Does everyone think their children are simply hilarious?...because mine leave me in stitches most days (except for when they are fighting over a McDonalds Happy Meal toy or seeing who can toss their applesauce-laden spoon the farthest or sleeping and I dare not let my giggles wake them).

Miss E. has been on a roll lately. The most cleaver, absurd, and down-right funny things have been popping out of her mouth.

I walked into the kitchen yesterday morning while the two were eating breakfast. E's eyes brightened and she exclaimed, "Mommy! My tummy is working just right!"

Good to know, daughter. Good. to. know.

During lunch today, she felt the need to count her blueberries. The girl can count to ten, sometimes farther, but still gets numbers jumbled on occasion. The counting today went something like this, "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,9, and 11-teen."

Yep. E. is so smart she coined a new number (11-teen) all by herself.

Finally, this afternoon as we were driving home from the pool (our "home-away-from-home" due to the EXCESSIVE heat here), a little voice yelled from the backseat, "Hey, look, I am a Mommy!"

Want to know what makes one a Mommy, according to Miss E.? Well, fixing a pair of sunglasses firmly atop ones head does.

Such a sweet girl.

Especially when she is sleeping.

What funny things has your kid said lately?

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Hopefully, sometime next week I will have some exciting news about where you can read some more of my writing. Stay tuned!

Surprise, Surprise, Tobe!

Today is a very special day, dear readers.

Today, my sweet husband, celebrates a birthday.

Because he does not blog, does not participate in Facebook (except through checking my account on a daily basis), does not twitter, nor partakes in any form of self-promotion...I am using this post to wish him a very happy birthday on this fine summer day.

I tend to do birthday events on a bit of a grand scale (remember Rocket? How about the fact I wore a costume to Evelyn's Second birthday party?) and Tobe's birthday is no exception. For his blog post shout-out (which you are currently reading...in case you missed that point due to my rambling), I decided to have the kids perform a little song and dance number.

I think I had visions of the Huxtables and their yearly performance for the grandparents' anniversary. Obviously I did not have the talent coach or the professional child actors when attempting to "teach" my children a few basic moves to go along with a great birthday song.

Check out a YouTube clip of the Huxtables' performance:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSvGdfOfLFw

(Sorry, embedding of this clip has been disabled. You'll have to check out the clip via the link and then pop back over to my blog)

Check out Isaac and Evelyn's performance:

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Want to know the sad thing? This was the fifth or sixth attempted taping of said performance. In one shot, Isaac falls off the fireplace. In another, Evelyn decides to start talking randomly to me about something. In a third, the two begin fighting over whose foot touched the other's toe.

Obviously, this is a video only a Father could love.

Thanks for sticking through it for those of you who don't happen to be Tobe.

Happy Birthday, Tobe! We love you!

An Open Letter to Target

Dear Target,

In case your headquarters in Minneapolis have lost their corporate calendar, I felt the need to inform you that today happens to be July the 7th. Imagine my surprise when I entered your store this morning to discover the "Back-to-School" section is completely set up and ready for business.

Do not misunderstand me, I *heart* a fresh box of 24 crayons and a new bottle of glue more than the average consumer. In fact, I recently purchased five new boxes of crayons at another major retail store due to the fact they were on sale for 25 cents a box. However, I believe the beginning of July is a tad to early to start the whole "Back-to-School" shopping campaign. My children are just getting used to the idea of summer and lazy schedules. Temperatures are hitting triple digits on a regular basis. Please know that we are not ready to contemplate such concepts as "lunchboxes" or "fall jackets" at this date in time.

Although I am resistant to the idea of pushing "Back to School" shopping on your costumers in the middle of summer, please know that I am forced to partake in such shopping if I do not want to be left having to choose between the three lone (read: Tacky) backpacks that will be on the shelves when "Back to School" time actually arrives in our area (read: September). I know if I want a cute water bottle for my kids or a perky container of classroom Kleenex I will have to shop for such supplies this month. Then I will have to clean a space in my garage for said supplies to live for the next eight weeks until school actually begins.

At least I will have a space to store the Christmas junk that I will inadvertently purchase on September 17th when you place it on your shelves...

Sincerely,
A Frustrated Target Shopper


***

Apparently, I need to take a look at my own calender as well. Due to an extended holiday celebration here at casa de phillips, I completely forgot yesterday was Monday. Fruit of the Spirit Lesson should be up later tonight!

Photographed on the 4th of July

When Evelyn was three months old, I ran into a college acquaintance in a local mall's food court.
I did not notice this friend at first, however she approached me and offered a generous greeting.

The reason I did not notice her was because I had just come from the picture studio attempting to get a decent shot of a three month old and an almost two-year old. My hair was matted to my face by sweat, my clothes were half untucked, and the remnants of the make-up that somehow survived the session were splattered across my face.

I offered a feeble "hello" while I greedily slurped on a coke, attempting to restore my blood sugar to its rightful levels, while shoving chicken nuggets at my crying toddler and shaking a bottle for my starving baby.

Although I love adorning the walls of casa de phillips with pictures of our little family...I detest the process of having pictures made. I told Tobe the other night there is likely a four month window in the entire span of a child's life when he/she cooperates fully with the professional picture process. When they are babies they are either hungry or tired. Toddlers are grumpy, scared, or resistant. Older children would rather be playing than smiling. Adolescents simply glare at the camera.

This is likely why such a website as this exists.

Despite my slight hatred of having pictures made, yesterday our family joined nine other family members (four of those children. If you do the math, that makes SIX children involved in our picture taking process) for a professional picture taking extravaganza. Amazingly, the whole process could almost be described as painless.

Children laughed adorably.

Everyone smiled.

Evelyn waited to have a potty-training accident until after the photos were done and we had changed her clothes.

It was good times (almost)

***

Here are a few of our family pictures from yesterday. Enjoy!

Friday Links: Fourth of July Edition

*Where, oh, where was this advice when I started blogging four years ago? (obviously not Fourth of July-related, but good stuff anyway)

*Celebrating the Fourth of July, CakeWrecks Style

*Earlier this week, the children and I made seasonal coloring books to pass by some of these hot summer days. I simply downloaded the material and secured the pages together using a hole punch and cute ribbon. The kids kept referring to the firecracker as a "candle". Sigh. I guess this is what growing up in the suburbs does to a child. By the time I was five, I was likely part of the neighborhood crew canvassing the neighborhood for abandoned bottles to serve as bottle rocket launchers (although I never actually launched a bottle rocket due to a severe fear of the noise).

*Want to put those Christmas cookie cutters to good use during July but fear the results actual cookies might have on your hips? Try a fun craft using star cookie cutters!

*Mmm... red, white and blue food.

*The children's cousins are in town this holiday and I am thinking patriotic skewers just might serve as a good form of entertainment tomorrow when the thermometer hits 103 degrees.

*Who doesn't love a good corn dog? Could this corn dog actually be considered healthy?

*Tobe and I have been watching the John Adams mini-series lately. It is excellent and has really caused me to appreciate this 4th of July a little bit more than I have in years past. I would like to say to television networks that I greatly enjoy a good mini-series. Please, please, Major Television Network, contemplate doing more mini-series and less reality TV. Thanks.

Happy Fourth of July!

Wonder

Childhood wonder is such a blessing to life. I question when exactly it is that the human soul transforms from a being of boundless energy and immense joy to becoming something that is a bit scarred, a bit jaded, and a bit annoyed by the world around them.



The wonder of a child is quite the encouragement when one is deep in the Mommy trenches, allowing me to see past the tantrums (um..have I mentioned that a local police officer stopped to offer help in a parking lot the other day due to a particular two year old's tantrum. I. Could. Have. Died.), the million daily requests, and the constant desire for Goldfish crackers.

This morning as I was about to jump in the shower, Tobe peeked his head into the bathroom and informed me I needed to see Isaac first. As I glanced around the door frame, I got a glimpse of a little blond hair boy grinning from ear to ear, fully dressed (including shoes) in clothes rummaged from his dirty clothes hamper. Despite the fact that the time on the clock read 6:17am, this little boy was beyond proud of the fact that he took the initiative to dress himself on this fine Thursday morning.

After my shower, I quickly discovered that said initiative did not end with a desire to get dressed before the sun came up. No, Isaac had also decided to rearrange his room. His bookshelf was completely repositioned, books were laid out in series (Help us the day the boy understands how to alphabetize...nothing will be safe), and every possible toy was assigned their own little plot of space on his carpet.

Taking a deep breath, I began the tour that Isaac was beyond eager to give. I went through the "shortcut" between the bookshelf and the wall, I visited the new "Isaac library", and I came to understand that all stuffed animals were now requesting to live on the floor as opposed to the bed. I fought my initial urge to sigh over the ginormous mess and instead embraced what Isaac saw: a room filled with endless wonder, possibility, and fun.

What a blessing the spirit of a child is.

What a blessing that Tobe assisted in the cleaning up of such "wonder" later this evening...

The Case of the Stuck Arm

Being the lover of books that he is, Isaac has recently discovered a fascination with detective novels (they have chapters, therefore I am considering them to be novels). These days everything has become a clue left to be discovered, a problem to be remedied, and a mystery to be solved.

Yesterday's mystery involved wooden slats and some butter.

The children and I were poking around in Isaac's room Monday morning, doing a bit of playing and a bit of straightening. I noticed that E. was simply standing next to Isaac's bed (his is a single, not a bunk) being unusually still. I asked the initial questions all mothers ask when a toddler is standing perfectly still, "Do you need to go to the restroom?". Such an inquiry was followed with a quiet "No."

I turned my attention back to the task at hand, chatting with Isaac in the process. About three minutes later, I hear a little girl's voice say, "My arm is stuck."

It was then that I noticed E.'s left arm was wedged between two of the narrow slats on Isaac's bed rail, thus being the reason she was standing perfectly still for such a long time. I went to free her and realized that the arm was seriously stuck.

Have I mentioned that I have a touch of the claustrophobia and tight places (or stuck limbs) can really freak me out? My dear husband has repeatedly told me should we ever find ourselves locked in some sort of restricted, tight confined space that it could result in the dissolvement of our marriage vows. Fortunately one never really finds themselves in restricted, tight spaces in the suburbs so I think our union is safe.

I attempted to gently pull out E.'s little arm while only hyperventalating slightly keeping a calm face. When I realized that it was STUCK I sent Isaac for some butter.

I may have never been a Brownie nor have ever earned one single patch for a sassy little sash, but I know one uses butter when stuck in a precarious situation. Perhaps I learned that on Food Network?

Isaac returned a painful five minutes later (Who knows what the boy stopped and did in that short walk from his room to the kitchen), holding a stick of butter and licking it. Nice.

I smeared a little butter on E.'s arm, a bit on the slats, and managed to free her in a matter of seconds. She and I hugged as if we had just come out on the winning end of some treacherous battle. Isaac simply asked if he could have another lick of the butter.

The Case of the Stuck Arm is officially closed.